Monday, August 31, 2009

Feeling a little crazy..... already.

I know I have only been on these birth control pills for a few days, but I am already feeling the effects. My dr. put me on a strong dosage and man can I tell. I have taken birth control a couple times in the past and I definately noticed a difference in myself, but nothing like these ones. It honestly feels like a first trimest pregnancy for me.... which isn't saying much since I've been very fortunate with them in the past. I'm completely up and down with my emotions, usually down at the expense of my poor husband and if I don't eat on time I start to feel nauseaus. I can't sleep at night b/c either a. my mind is on and I can't stop thinking, my dreams even wake me up or b. I'm having a nightmare, which hasn't happened in SOO long. I'm even jittery and having crazy anxiety/panick attacks. It's seriously the weirdest feeling. Maybe it's all in my head. I can only imagine what I'm going to be like once I start with the 'big time' hormones. Maybe it's a good thing that I am feeling these ones so much, atleast we know they are working. Maybe it means that my body responds well to hormone treatment... that would be awesome! It's all speculation at this point, but just thought I would share my thoughts.

I want this blog to be as honest as I can possibly make it. I'm sure there will be times of discomfort and obviously pain (ie, birth), but I wouldn't change it for the world. I want to share all the ups and downs, my fears and excitments. I want to complain about feeling crappy one day and marvel at a new deveolopement the next. I just want everyone to know that this is what I signed up for, I was educated in my decision and I am 100% onboard no matter what is tossed my way. Sitting here feeling crazy and hormonal and I'm still excited and enjoying the experience and we haven't technically even started yet.

Thanks to everyone who is joining me in this!!

3 comments:

  1. I'm so glad that you're being so so real about this whole experience...it makes it so interesting to read! And also so educational for people considering surrogacy :)
    You're awesome Brandi! Even if you are a tad hormonal! hehehe

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  2. Hey Brandi, I really hope that you start sleeping better and feeling good again! I didn't realize that the BCP's would have that kind of impact on you. We will pray (: You're the best.

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  3. Thanks Ali :) The sleeping is still the same, but I actually don't feel tired at all during the day so it's been ok. The other side effects have seemed to lessen as of today... maybe my body is adjusting :)

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